Premier League Hairstyles

May 23, 2013

 

The Premier League drew to a close yesterday and there was a strong sense that it marked the end of an era. Sir Alex Ferguson finally called time on his long and illustrious managerial career and a number of the English game’s biggest names also drew a line under their careers. Paul Scholes, Michael Owen, Jamie Carragher, Steve Harper and Stiliyan Petrov all bowed out after many years of service in the Premier League as did David Beckham and respected referee Mark Halsey.

 

The last day of the season was, as a usual, basked in glorious sunshine and we were treated to some breath-taking games as Arsenal trumped old rivals Tottenham once again for the the final Champions League place and Manchester United were held to a stunning 5-5 draw by West Brom. But whilst Gareth Bale swept many of the major individual awards, he does not feature in the Premier League style XI.

 

GK David De Gea

The young Spanish keeper turned almost as many heads with his high hair cut as he did with his sometime dodgy handling. Combined with his fluffy teenage beard and red nose; De Gea looks more like an embarrassed child than millionaire footballer.

 

RB Rafael

Making his way into the team for finally getting his barber to chop off his silly girl-fro. His performances have improved this season as well as he has added extra consistency.

 

LB Benoit Assou-Ekotto

A weekly visitor to the designer barber shop; BAE seldom has the same haircut for two games in a row. Unfortunately for Tottenham fans, his performances are as consistent as his hair.

 

CB Fabricio Colocini

One of the few Newcastle players who can hold their heads high after what was a frankly disappointing season for the magpies. His massive perm has become iconic at St James’.

 

CB Clint Hill

Balancing out his Argentinian partner; Clint Hill has the type of no-nonsense shaved head that centre backs have long been associated with.

 

RM Adel Taarabt

The individualistic Moroccan Maestro is a regular at his local hairdresser as his haircut is never less than precise and sharp.

 

LM Victor Moses

The young Nigerian has had something of a breakthrough season at Chelsea bagging important goals in the Europa League as his long dreadlocks add style and swagger to his buccaneering runs.

 

CM Mikel Arteta

Arteta’s hair has the same metronomic consistency of his passing. Seldom does a pass or a hair go astray with the Arsenal vice-captain.

 

CM Marouane Fellaini

The Goodison shop has to constantly re-stock its Fellaini wigs as the Toffees idolise their towering Belgian midfielder.

 

CF Arouna Kone

Unfortunately for Wigan fans, neither Kone’s bleached blonde hair or his glut of goals could save them from the drop.

 

CF Kenwyne Jones

The back-flipping striker may not have appeared for Potters as much as he would have hoped this season but his hair is certainly more interesting that Peter Crouch’s.

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